my boyfriend

[Guest ducklingdance]

my boyfriend had asked me to reject intimate dance moves. i'm more of doing comtemporary. i know this seems to be a small problem that i can easily do. but i don't want to appear so unprofessional asking telling the cherographer to change those intimate moves. last 2 weeks a friend of mine, a girl was practising for a commercial show. her costumes happened to be just undergarments( i have no idea what show is that). there was this move that a guy have to hug her freom behind. my friend's boyfriend happened to came in at that moment to see that. he was furious and he approached the cherographer asking him to change that. it's normal tohave boyfriends jealous. but i don't want my boyfriend to bve doing that if i'm unable to get those moves change. it's not that im not concerned about my boyfriend's feelings. but it might damage my career and reputation in dance. is there any porfessional way of rejecting intimate moves without sounding unporfessional? i don't want to have to choose between him and dance.. i hope someone can give me some enlightenment please. thanks.

[Mel Johnson]

There really is no way to TELL a choreographer to change something, but there is a way to signal that there may be problems with a move or combination. You can say, "Mr. X, I really don't feel comfortable in this particular passage, can you check it over?" Other times, a choreographer can set something, and it sounds OK, then when s/he sees it, "Oh my God, what have I done?" I should know, it's happened to me!

[Victoria Leigh]

duckling, performing is not real life. An actress has many scenes with other men, some of them involving kissing, holding, touching, etc. Since, IMO, a dancer is also an actress, when she has a scene that expresses involvement with another person, such as a pas de deux or a duet, very often the purpose of that dance is to show the relationship between the two people. I'm not saying that one should automatically accept everything a choreographer wants if it really goes beyond good taste, and Mr. Johnson's suggestion of telling the choreographer you are uncomfortable with a move is fine, but I'm saying that if your boyfriend is not going to accept your work, realizing it is work, like acting, then you have a large problem. It could very well come down to a choice.

 

I'm not talking about commercial, night club shows, or the like, but only of ballet or modern dance companies which perform classical ballets or works choreographed for them by contemporary choreographers. They are full of dances where female dancers are held, caressed, lifted, kissed, etc. Some of the lifts necessitate the partners hands being in some unusual places in order to achieve the effect of the lift. People notice the dancer in the lift, not how or where the partner is holding her, if it is performed well. If your boyfriend is going to object to that, then it's choice time, but IMO he is being very childish, or possibly just very culturally unaware. Take him to the movies!

[Guest ducklingdance]

i just hope i don't get thses kind of moves so i don't have to worry.. hope he would be more understanding. it's gonna be a hard choice if i have to choose. so far we don't have this probelm yet. hope it would never happen.. thanks for the advices...