Gratitude

[vagansmom]

Reading many of these posts this morning once again reminds me why I love this board. I have learned so much here from the generous folks who frequent BA's parent forum.

 

I've always been grateful at the generosity of the parents and teachers here. I can ask questions and know that no one is trying to sell me anything but is giving freely from their own heart. That is such a great gift, and one that unfortunately is becoming rarer, especially online where often people are really just trying to plug a product or service.

 

I'm made wonderful friends here. I've traveled to other parts of the country and visited them, some have come here and spent time with me. We've gone to dance performances together, and we all continue to share our stories and advice on many issues unrelated to ballet.

 

When my daughter was younger and flying to a distant SI, she flew there with the daughter of a BA poster we'd just met. Right now, she's renting living space from a BA poster who also gives her free tickets to attend dance events she could never have afforded on her own. Another poster and her daughter became my dd's surrogate family for a time. BA posters have attended a couple of her professional performances far from home. My daughter has made some major decisions about her present life based on interaction with BA posters who've shown her support and friendship, expecting nothing else in return.

 

It's my greatest hope that the current new crops of posters will also find this generosity of spirit among themselves.

[mini cooper]

Vagansmom,

 

As always you are very wise. Thanks for sharing your success stories about this very small, tightly woven network.

 

As in all things, the small acts of kindness that are shared here have far reaching affects.

 

Thanks for starting this thread.

 

mc

[mylildancer]

Like Vagansmom, I too deeply appreciate this board. It is different from all the others that are so rife with frivolous conversation (or maybe I just don't know about other good ones).

 

The one thing I appreciate the most is the different colors and flavors to the posts. There are as many different colors and flavors as there are personalities on the board. Take Watermill for instance. I love his posts because there are times he likes to play the devil's advocate. So much like my husband, whom I miss dearly. Maybe that's why I like Watermill's posts so much.

 

As one from the Inland West, I need all of the different posts because of the isolation and misinformation that is so prevelant here. We are all adults. If we find a post that doesn't sit well with our own situation, we can go on to the next. It's when the bickering starts, and I've seen in a few times since I've started reading this board, not just lately, it saddens me because it will chase others away. We need to remember that everyone's opinion is respected here. If there is a real problem with a post, the moderators will step in and delete it.

 

As a former lurker, I know that it can take guts to post and lay it out there for all to see. Here's to all who contribute!

 

PS: Watermill, I meant that devil's advocate thing in a most respectful way.

[werlkj]

I, too, am enormously grateful for this board. I feel like I have joined a community whose goal is to help each other. It is so nice to know that I have a sounding board and support group to help me and my dk make the best decisions we can.

 

In our part of the country, a lot of studios essentially close down for the summer and if a class is offered, it is essentially just to help the really serious kids who are going away to SIs. My dks' studio is holding two three-week half-day intensives to fill the gaps of June and August. If anyone near SE Idaho has a youngster that wants to take three hours of intermediate or advanced class and pointe daily, and wants to work hard, please let me know. I would prefer a ds, as I have two ds's, but we could probably work out room for a dd also. Our studio's faculty is excellent and Liuba Kosireva Patterson will guest teach at the first intensive in June and Seth Olson (current BW principal) will guest teach at the second in August.

[Treefrog]

Add me to the list. Not only have I learned a tremendous amount about ballet, I've gained a community of friends -- some of whom I've met, some of whom I correspond with, and some of whom I simply exchange views with on the board. I look forward each day to a new conversation.

 

Vagansmom, don't underestimate your own role in making this board the wonderful place that it is. Your contributions are informed and wise and compassionate.

[Balletmom]

Add me to the list as one who doesn't know how I could ever maneuver through this life of a parent of a teenager/ballet-dancer without this board. I've learned so much from the knowledgeable moderators and wonderful posters since I first started lurking a few years back. I enjoy reading all the posts from all of you "regulars." I feel like I've come to know each of you just a little, and I can't underestimate how much you've taught me. I only hope that I can someday give back as much as I've received. Let's hope this board continues to be a place where honest discussions can take place in an atmosphere of respect for diverse viewpoints. (Isn't that the point of a "discussion"?)

[Guest Watermill]

Mylildancer, you made my day! That's exactly what I'm often doing: playing devil's advocate. It's nice to hear that it is appreciated, because sometimes I fear that it will be taken the wrong way. I also worry sometimes that my very Irish humor will not be understood, but fortunately Major Mel usually comes along and says something even more outrageous!

 

One of the best aspects of this board is a kind of comradship. My wife is in Florida chaperoning our professional track 15 year old daughter. I miss her a lot and this board helps so much.

 

Cheers!

 

Watermill

[BW]

Naturally, I'm grateful too - and it was vagansmom who introduced me to Ballet Talk.

 

Two sentences, especially, struck me tonight from your first post vagansmom:

I've always been grateful at the generosity of the parents and teachers here. I can ask questions and know that no one is trying to sell me anything but is giving freely from their own heart...

And finally when you wrote

It's my greatest hope that the current new crops of posters will also find this generosity of spirit among themselves.

 

Amen and amen. It's extremely important to respect each other and to think about what we write and how it effects others.

[syr]

I'll just add, "cheers" to you all.

[Guest enjoyingtheride]

Well, as a new member of the group, who has been reading the "mail" for a couple of weeks, I am so glad that I discovered you all! I also participate in a discussion list that appears in my e-mail daily for a health problem that another child has, and DD is so glad that we found a place for "her" situation as a student of ballet.

 

I am so encouraged by what I have been reading and am delighted that so many parents are taking a part in sharing their knowledge of ballet matters. Vagansmom, I enjoy your posts! There are so many others as well, but as I'm not familiar with you yet, I can't recall names as I write this. Whoever wrote that it took a while to write, I agree. So I just would like to say that I am here and I am really enjoying the ride!!!

 

We have 6th grade daughter who is in a pre-professional school and is passionate about having her future in dance. She has excellent instruction, if not really too much of it. All she desires is to perfect her skill and grow into the dancer that she sees in her mind. She is as serious as I could never have imagined a child could be. Growing up, I would marvel at the stories that I heard about the youngest Olympics athletes and what most sacrificed to attain their goals. I could never understand what mind-set it took for a student to awake at 4 to get on the ice at 5 and work for three hours before going to academics! But now that I actually have such a creature in my own life, (through no fault of my own, I must add), I am learning just what it does take!!

 

We have adjusted our life style to her demands of class time and although some of my extended family members didn't understand what was happening, most have seen that she is one of those single-minded children who is goal-oriented. She has had to give up friendships to some degree with friends that do more regular things and that has been the saddest result of her immersion into ballet. We strive to help her keep close with a couple of them, and they are patient friends, yet I worry that that part of her life may disappear some day to become special memories.

 

I guess my only concern at this point in my ride is that her social group has become rather limited to the other young people who are at the school with her. Is this experience something I should be worried about? Her schedule limits the time she has to spend with non-ballet friends to Sundays and even the summer "free time" is now compromised by intensives.....augghhhh! It is a hard decision, as her parents, to even allow this course of action for our DD. Does this sound at all familiar?

 

She does regret the compromises she is forced into making, yet still chooses to go ahead with her ballet. Otherwise, her experiential background is strong for her age.

 

Anyway, here I am, and glad of it!!! You are a great group!

[Victoria Leigh]

Hello Enjoyingtheride, welcome to the Moms and Dads forum here on Ballet Talk for Dancers!

 

I would not worry about the outside of dance social life. Dancers develop their friends from within their life, and their social life within that circle as well. Not that the others are totally out of the picture, but generally they will become less involved as time goes on, since there is simply no real connection there. If she one of those who has been chosen by this life in the ballet bubble, it's not such a bad thing. Yes, we are a bit different, but most of us are "real people" too, and even have a little bit of life outside dance ;) Dancers are intelligent, committed, and focused way beyond the normal teen, and they have a self discipline that is instilled from the training, which can take them far in anything they decide to do. So, hang in there, and continue to enjoy the ride!

[mcrm55]

Oh gosh, what a lovely series of postings! Thanks, Vagansmom, for starting it! I have been obsessed with the site in the last few days, because it is such a relief to find Ballet Talk, especially the Moms and Dads section. The ballet studio world here in New York is such a fish-bowl sometimes, and when you speak with other parents, and sometimes even teachers, you really don't know what everyone's agendas are. Here, because of the anonymity, except when we choose to relinquish it, and because the membership represents such a wonderfully broad range of opinion, and includes such knowledgeable advisors, I feel much safer already to ask questions, explore options, listen to different experiences and learn from it all. Thanks so much, all of you, this is really great.