Attitude Problems in Class

[Nycbdancer]

Hi,

 

Haven't posted in a while but I'm back. I have a question about how to deal with attitude problems from other girls in my dance class. I recently got moved up to the highest level of my dance school along with two other girls and the girls who were already there, refuse to talk to me or acknowledge me. This hasn't happened to the other two girls who moved up so why me??? This is the best studio in my area and I'm finishing out the year there and leaving for CPYB in September, but the end of the year a long way off. How do I deal with their attitudes until then?

[vrsfanatic]

Nycbdancer, congratulations on your promotion into the highest level! This is an accomplishment you can be proud of. It is difficult to say why the young ladies in your class are not as open with you as they are with the others. I do suggest however that for a while just smile at them and ignore their bad manners. Eventually they may forget their silliness and begin to show the nicer side to their personalities. The only thing you can really be sure of is yourself. No one can make others conduct themselves in any way at all. For now, concentrate on your goals, but remain open to the others in your class. Sometimes with time these things tend to work themselves out and young people forget that there ever was a divide. I hope this will be the case for you.

 

Stay focused but remain kind and polite to all. Let me know how things progress.

[Mel Johnson]

Jackye, suck it up, blow it off. They're going to ignore you? Ignore them. That way, nobody has confrontations. They're clearly jealous of you, but then, who cares? If you head for a professional career, then you're going to have meet and defeat a lot of this. If they decide to talk to YOU, then be sweet and forgiving.

[dancer31220]

The same thing sort of happens to me. Me and a few others are new to a level and most of the other girls dont really talk with us. They dont ignore us, but they dont talk to us either (am i contradicting myself??). Just ignore the girls in your class--its them who are missing out, not you. Maybe you could try and hang out with the other 2 girls who are new to your level? Good luck!

[Guest probablydancin]

They are just jealous, don't let them get down on you. Best of Luck!

[Nycbdancer]

Thanks vrsfanatic and thanks to everyone for the suggestions,

 

I guess I'll go with your advice and just ignore them for now. I just kind of wondered because it's only the kids in this level who're like that. And probablydancin, I used to be able to hang out with the other girls, but when it became a decision of either me or the other kids in my class, they chose them.

 

THanks for the help everyone...

 

I'll how this goes

[Nycbdancer]

Hi again,

 

I have a new update as to the situation at hand. One of my best friends in my old class from last year was talking to these older girls and happened to find out why they disliked me. She told me it was because I liked dance too much to skip it for a party, school dance, sleep over, or just because I didn't feel like attending class. Anyways, I'll just keep going to class and talking to people in other levels who are kinder . Just thought to share the news.

 

[Victoria Leigh]

Sounds to me like they may be older, but perhaps not wiser nor better because they are not serious about ballet. So, they resent someone who is. Don't waste your time caring. It's not important to have friends in ballet who do not share your committment and focus.

[angel_lissa_91]

The same thing happened to me this year when I moved up a level, but long story short I was nice and a couple of months later they warmed up...I think it is because they are older!

Edited October 10, 2004 by angel_lissa_91

[Nycbdancer]

Back again...

 

They aren't getting any better... in fact they're getting worse! Tonight in class, my dance teacher had to once again remind them to take off jewelry, and junk clothing. I was the only one out of eight kids who had my hair in a bun, didn't have jewelry, etc., etc. so my dance teacher said thank you to me for following the rules. She also complemented me on articulating me feet in pointe so one girl (the teacher's daughter) said that "We don't give a damn about Jackye anymore" to the teacher . The teacher got mad and sent her out of class. Later, the girl next to me did a good triple, so the teacher told her good job. Another girl in my group says that the teacher would've seen her triple if she hadn't been busy watching me. But the teacher explained that she wasn't and the girl got mad. She also was sent out. Up until now, ignoring them has worked quite well for me as I have other friends, but this is getting way out of hand and I'm feeling sorry for my dance teacher who is desparately trying to control them, but they just refuse to listen. She wanted to kick the kids out permanently because all the dedicated ones were leaving as a result of their actions, but we're so small a studio that we don't have such a leisure.

 

Sorry for the whining, but I needed to get that off my chest.

[Mel Johnson]

IMO, I think she'd be better off just telling them not to come back. No teacher should have to stand up for that sort of insubordination, and no student should have to be troubled by it.

[Nycbdancer]

Thanks Mel...

 

We're one of the best technique schools in our area and the most well-known as we're the only local company to dance with the local symphony. We'd be a lot bigger and were at one time until these girls came and ran people off.

 

P.S. A couple years ago, about five girls with an even worse attitude/behavior problems got together and started yelling at the director about how much the partnering dance sucked and they hated it and she was mean for making them do this. They were all promptly expelled.

Edited October 21, 2004 by Nycbdancer

[Guest PointShuPrincess]

Wow...I didn't know ballet dancers could be so rude. At my ballet school, all I get are snobby dancers, who don't even talk to me. Ms. Leigh is right, they probably are not as serious as you are. Ballet dancers are supposed to give respect to their teachers and their peers. They usually are expected to do what they are told. They obviously are extremely jealous of you, I know it may be hard but try your best to ignore it and keep on dancing. If you can't stand it anymore, maybe you should talk to the director or the teacher.

[elizzy]

Ugh . . . we have girls like that at my studio, and I know how frustrating it can be when you're trying to concentrate and there are people who don't take anything seriously. Two of the girls were literally holding a conversation about something not-dance related at all during plies, while the music was playing and everyone else was dancing. I could hardly believe it!

 

I would agree with everyone else's suggestions, don't get wrapped up in it, because you don't want to get in trouble yourself. Good luck!

[Guest cheeriodancer10]

Whenever I sense tension between me and other dancers (like when I make up in an older class or we're combined) , I just ignore them and try to have fun . I find it helps to not think of competing with the others, but rather have a competition with myself and try to make my own improvements. Good luck, nycbdancer, with these girls' chilish behavior!