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Ballet Talk for Dancers

Social Life VS Dance


Perfectpointe731

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I just wanted to get some opinions on balancing social life and dancing. There are some mothers at my studio who say "If you want to be a dancer, you CANNOT have a social life. Dance must be your entire life. Period." However, other moms say, "You need to have a social life...you don't have enough friends and you don't go out on the weekends enough. Don't go to that audition or take that class, you need to be out having fun".

 

Any thoughts on when a dancer should sacrifice some dance time to have a life and when it becomes ok to sacrifice a social life for dance?

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Very individual situation. There are no rules here, and none of the mothers are right. What is right for one student is not necessarily right for another. Some dancers manage to have some social life, although somewhat limited in terms of what other teens might have. It's a matter of priorities. Do what is right for you. Find the balance, but keep your priorities in order. If dance is more important, then social life will be limited, but that does not mean it is non existant. If social life is more important, then probably you are not meant for a career in ballet.

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Also, in many cases, dance becomes your social life. Everyone at my studio is very close and really supportive of each other. I think that stems from people being together five or six days a week, and sharing the same goals and hopes. While it's nice to have friends outside of ballet class too, it can be hard manage, which is why dancers often have to forgo that luxery. But my opinion is that it doesn't really matter where your social life is, whether it's dance related, or seperate, as long as you're happy with the situation.

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In our experience, each year dance became more and more of a CHOSEN priority . . . first the piano lessons went, then the band at school, then trying out for school musical (or anything else that required afternoon participation). Seems to happen naturally and with very little social angst for a dancer who is passionate and focused. Sometimes I worry a little about the phone not ringing much for Dd, but when I pick her up at the studio each evening and she bubbles over "I LOVE to dance!" I know she is doing what makes her most happy. She's not becoming "anti-social" in character, still climbs off the school bus laughing with people and seems to have quality friendships vs. quantity socializing. . . . When I think back to my own high school experience, it was chock-full of socializing (band, cheerleader, parties, etc.) but quite a bit of that was negative. So, hey, maybe these busy teens are missing some of the bad stuff, too!! Another plus is that these kids seem to get self-sufficient and form positive self images that don't depend on peer approval. I am a substitute teacher in middle schools and I see so many kids defining themselves by their social circles.

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I agree with the above post. I have a very big social life and a rigorous ballet schedule. I love ballet so much that I would not even mind having to give up a bit of my social life. But then again, I function well with not much sleep...

It is about balance, yin and yang. It is just like balancing doing your homework and going to late night rehearsals (ok maybe not JUST like that but it's close)

And it is also about priorites and time and what YOU want. It in not about what the other moms want.

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Being at the studio over 20 hours a week, I really don't have much time for a social life at the moment. The only day I have off consistently is Friday so I usually try to do something with friends on that day, but some days I'm so tired I just want to collapse into bed. My friends are fairly understanding though, and if I have to go late to a party or event they don't mind.

 

Personally, I don't really mind missing out on a bit of social life for dance. I figure I have the rest of my life for just "hanging out" but this is the point in my life where I have the time and resources to train intensively and I don't want to give that up. :)

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Hey...Just here to give my opinion... :P

 

 

I find that dance has it's own social life. :yes: The girls at dance are like family.

 

I love being there and with my school friends...I always find time to fit both sides in.

 

I think you need to have balance! :thumbsup:

 

Good luck! :thumbsup:

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It isn't about what the moms at your studio think, it's about what you think. :yes: If you want to sacrifice social time, then your mom can't make you hang out with a friend. If you want to have more social time, you'd need to find free time or stop taking ballet so much each week. :P For me, I have no time during the week, but sometimes I can hang with friends on Sundays or during vacation. :thumbsup: Also, I have a lot of good friends in my ballet class. :thumbsup:

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