"Netiquette" and the Victorian Tea Party

[BW]

Think of this as a public service announcement.

 

Most of you have probably read Mel Johnson's sage advice that as members of this discussion forum, we should all conduct ourselves as though we are attending a "Victorian tea party" - in other words that we must remain within the bounds of "polite society" and that, while we may disagree, we must remember to contain our emotions and follow "The Golden Rule" , i.e., do unto others as you would have them do unto you - in this case - in writing.

 

I'm going to add to this, some might say, old fashioned image an up-to-date spin by reminding us all of the truism that when one writes something on the Internet, be it on a discussion board, a blog, an online bulletin board, an instant message or, even, in an email, one should only write what one would feel comfortable seeing emblazoned across the front page of "the" newspaper.

 

Because the ease of the Internet offers such fast access to and sharing of information, I think it's often easy to forget that we're not in a vacuum when we post. As parents we all care deeply about our children, that's a given , but we must remember in our descriptions of auditions or performances or summer intensives, that when we relate these experiences we must take particular care when we choose to describe situations that include students - because we are either talking about our own children or someone else's children. So let's choose our words with care. How would we feel if they recognized themselves in our posts, especially if what they read could be construed by them as something negative or unkind?

 

Although I'm sure not one of us would willfully hurt or offend our own children or anyone else's publically , it can happen inadvertently when we forget that the ballet world is a small one and is often made more intimate because of this online community.

 

How's that for a long version of: think before you post.

Edited February 15, 2006 by BW

[chauffeur]

and the judges' scores for BW's long-version message:

 

Technical skill in use of emoticons: 63.95

Composite for message content: 71.45

Overall score: 135.4

 

(and since no one knows what the new scoring system means, let's just say the crowd goes wild with approval )

 

(politely, of course)

[balletbooster]

You're are quite funny, chauffeur!

[Silver Penny]

I also have to applaud the scoring system by Chauffeur as well as the thoughts by BW. We all need to take heed to the advice. Especially knowing our children may be reading...and they also know faces and names!

[dancindaughters]

Thank you for that excellent reminder, BW! It is all to too easy to forget about the feeling of those faceless readers. I agree that we must be especially careful of what we say about children. Also, the ballet world is very small. I had no idea when I began posting here that I might someday meet my fellow posters!

 

If I could add a small suggestion, it is that people try to refrain from bringing up other posters past posts with an intention of pointing out their hypocricy or other failings. Of course, we are all free to go back and read others' previous posts, (assuming that we have that much available time)... but I really think it is the height of bad manners to attempt shame others this way. I could post links to examples of this type of behaviour, but it would not be kind or lady-like! Thank you.

[mmded]

So true about old posts dancindaughters!!!

What you believe to be gospel (sorry I can't think of another descriptive) truth may be far from the your truth six months or a year from your post.

[Gracey]

Naturally what one thinks 6 months ago can change drastically (is that not learning?), and the other problem is that the entire conversation is left out of the quote, which can, at times, bring an entire new meaning to innocent words.

 

I would imagine that we are all smart enough to refer back to previous posts any member has made, but it is important to read the whole topic to get the gist of it and truly learn from it. The complete information is invaluable, not just one particular sentence which can ( though I am not saying "is") be taken out of context.