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ondine88

teary-eyed SI phone call

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mygurl

We just got home from dropping our dd at her SI. I thought we were going to have tears from her because she was put in a single room, no roomates, and she was very disappointed. We talked it up to her before we left, the advantages of having your own room, but we were both teary eyed when we said our goodbyes.

But tonite she called, and she is hanging out in a new friend's room. So, I guess all is well...

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dancemomCA
:dry: Yup, boys just don't seem to call home much. My DS will call when he needs more $$$, or has had a really great day or a really crappy day. Last year, after dropping him off, meeting his RA and roommate, I was politely asked to leave (I think I was in the residence for a total of 5 mins!). :thumbsup: I've grown used to his phone call pattern, but it is still wonderful to get a call when he is thrilled with dance class or rehearsal. :thumbsup: I've had my share of down-in-the-dumps calls too, usually those are during the school year. Keep the faith everyone, I've yet to experience a year where he has come home unhappy, tired maybe, but never disappointed! I'm certain most dancers feel the same way.

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ondine88

Things are looking up..........although dd is still not happy about being there without knowing anyone she actually sounded excited on the phone tonight as she told me about her character class and how much she liked the instructor.

 

This thread has been wonderful therapy! (I had a good laugh at dazedandconfused's story about crying while watching class at her studio.)

 

Thanks - you're a great bunch!

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pat

This has helped me also! I think my dd is going to be fine, I'm happy she is calling, and she too sounded excited this morning. I think I will pass on dropping by the studio and watching class, though I did laugh out loud at that.

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balletbooster

As for trying to make contact with those elusive, independent, older teens - I've found text messaging to be my best ploy. It is less obtrusive and can be done without the need for her to even open her mouth. :D

 

If I send a text and get no reply, I've been known to follow with one that reads, "Would you rather I called you?" This usually results in a return text with all the information I asked for. :D When she does check in with a real phone call, it is usually done amidst a flurry of friends and is so short that I get little information except that she is having fun. Yesterday's report was that it was an 'awesome' day. Need one say more? :innocent::blink:

 

Thank goodness for other moms who have kids at your child's SI! That network really comes into play during summer programs, when you all can compare what your children have mentioned in the sporadic and hasty phone calls and together you have at least 25% of what is really going on at the SI! :P:D:shrug:

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happyfeet24

Right on! Balletbooster, how true that is. What great suggestion you made about text message too!

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lovemydancers
I've found text messaging to be my best ploy. It is less obtrusive and can be done without the need for her to even open her mouth. :innocent: If I send a text and get no reply, I've been known to follow with one that reads, "Would you rather I called you?"

 

:P Ha Ha!! I love it! I too usually get more response from text messages (the friends never need to know it's Mom :shrug: ) but I love your "alternative", balletbooster!

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dazedandconfused

Might add a note of caution that I got into severe hot water with my better half when I went over on my text messages and the charges started piling up. Definitely check your plans! And make sure your kiddo has their phone passworded so no one can peek at messages that should stay private. I've, unfortunately, had to send a few of those. "Now listen here, little Miss! ..." You get the idea.

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balletgirlsmadre

Reading through these messages, it makes me realize how lucky we are that our children can have cell phones and call us while at their SIs. Most parents of kids in more traditional camp settings have no contact whatsoever.

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cheetah

Yes, we went the text messaging route last year. It worked great for awhile until he started ingoring those, too. We decided since he didn't use it with us we'd just close the plan and he couldn't use it with friends. As for traditional camps - there's this thing called the post office! You know, where you write letters and mail them! How hard can that be? Apparently pretty hard. When DS went to camp at the Citadel they made them all sit down on day two and send a postcard home. It was stamped and everything. In addition, we sent stamped, addressed envelopes. Never got a one in the two summers he went. Something about it took too much time to walk to the post office and there wasn't enough time and it was hot or raining, etc. Some more traditional camps actually have letter writing days periodically throughout the camp to make sure the kids are communicating with their parents. By the middle of an SI I'd be very happy with a short note!

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tracym

Text messaging has been the thing with us also.....works great. DD (12) is at her first SI and loving it....tired but loving it. My husband dropped her off on saturday and once everything was in the room she let him know that he could leave now. I came into town sunday and am staying at my parents 45 minutes away for a few days until I head back home and today I had to go take her some new shoes....we didnt send her with the right kind of walking shoes....and she politely told me and her grandmother that she really didnt have time for us to stay for lunch. In a way Im sad, but Im more happy that this is already a good experience for her and shes not homesick.

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Treefrog
Reading through these messages, it makes me realize how lucky we are that our children can have cell phones and call us while at their SIs. Most parents of kids in more traditional camp settings have no contact whatsoever.

 

 

Right! The policy at the camp my kids used to attend is no phone calls (under ordinary circumstances -- of course calls are allowed for birthdays or emergencies). Or rather, that used to be the policy; they've had to amend it in the modern era to "one phone call per 4-week session" because kids -- and parents -- are so phone-oriented these days. The 'no contact' policy is actually a really good one, GIVEN the environment (high staff:camper ratio, highly trained staff attuned to socioemotional issues, etc). The idea is to help kids grow, away from their parents but in a supportive environment. And, I think, it's to help parents let go of their kids, knowing they are in a supportive environment.

 

Also, there is a "no mail, no meal" policy on Tuesday evenings: the kids have to drop a letter into the mailbag on the way into the dining hall, and if they don't have one, they have to stop right there and pen a note on a postcard that the staff has waiting. (Typically, those notes read: "Dear Mom, I have to send this because I'm hungry and it's No Mail No Meal night. Love, DD" -- but still, it's mail.)

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Pasdetrois

Treefrog, that sounds like a boarding school in the north of Scotland with only cold running water and no heating. A little Dickensian to my over the top mothering mind and style! That's a pretty hard set of rules to live by and I'm not sure I like it. You must be made of stronger stuff than I am, I don't think I could do it. Each child is different, as well as each parent and each family. It's very true that there are different strokes for different folks. It's a good job we aren't all the same, it does make the world more interesting. By the way, there is such a school in Scotland, very popular amongst certain social groups, the school is Gordonston

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msd

Actually, I love the 'No Mail -- No Meal" idea. Of course, I am sitting here w/my laptop in a hotel w/dd...one more night before I drop her at a "traditional" ballet camp setting -- no cell phones, no computers.... In fact, she just came out of the shower and asked (when I'm done) for "one more touch with reality" :( (in jest, of course). We had a wonderful 400+ mile drive, had dinner and miniature golf and went to the beach today...and tomorrow I "drop my child off in the woods". She's excited, thrilled. Me, too...but I must admit I am envious of those of you who can keep a more constant tab on your dancer. (Dd does have a fine selection of postcards and stationery, sufficient postage to run a small zip code, and a bulging address book -- she's looking forward to writing letters...w/out a spell checker.) It's a first SI...and she went for the no contact locale! :wink: Wish us luck!!

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l2daisygirl

Merde to you, msd. It is a summer well spent...for you and for her.

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