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Ballet Talk for Dancers

Shift in level, shift in parents


SAMI4166

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This age and level seems to be where the differences become readily apparent and I know there are some hearts breaking in her class both the students and their moms, especially the moms who wanted a ballet career for their child. Best to practice compassion. Practice compassion but keep on working. Being the best in this class means nothing. Doing her best, trying her hardest, that means something.

 

 

Wise words. I am guessing our dd's must be about the same age. DD's longtime best friend in ballet inexplicably stopped talking to her around Nutcracker. And no, there shouldn't have been any friction about roles; they both had the same roles as the year before. DD gave her "space" for a while but finally asked if she had done anything wrong. Best friend said no, they hugged and dd thought the cold shoulder was over. Next day, same thing...friend would not talk, have eye contact, would not stand next to dd at bar and avoided at all costs going across the floor in the same group. DD got in car and said, well I know I didn't do anything wrong; this is her problem. It hurt, there were tears and many weeks of not wanting to push herself in class because she was afraid the "friend" would accuse her of showing off.

 

DD recently saw a lot of very talented kids her age dance at a very high level and realized that she needs to quit worrying about "showing off," work her hardest-even if it means that she can do things the others are struggling with. There are things that they do that she struggles with and she will be working hard to master those. She still tries to have pleasant exchanges with this girl but is usually met with a grimace or rolled eyes or "attitude." She even asked her is she was ok after a fall in class over the weekend but got the "I don't like you" tone back. DD said it doesn't matter anymore; as long as she does the right thing. Strange, she has gotten a couple of e-mails that were nice. (Guilt?, mom's direction, who knows?)The mixed signals are confusing but dd will not trust this kid for a very long time. I do hope that as these kids mature, they can reestablish a friendship based on common interests but only time will tell.....

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