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Ballet Talk for Dancers

Moving On & Letting Go

Guest unsoccer-mom

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:) Best wishes to your daughter Redstorm! You and she did a great job along the dance journey. Now, she's off to the stage via another art form, but no less daunting! And university. You should be very proud.
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Thank you so much for posting your story Redstorm. I was hoping you would eventually do so. :) I wish you and your daughter the best as she enjoys life and a new path. She will definitely make her mark no matter what arena she chooses.


I hope you will visit often, and continue to post. Your perspective is important to share with others and a lesson to all.

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Best of luck to you and your daughter. Your struggles are some that we all share, esepecially those of us who let our kids study away from home. But it's so exciting to begin a new journey! New goals, new dreams, new experiences! And it's so nice when they're back home. It's hard to be on edge day after day wondering if you're child is OK while away at school. It's nice to have them back so you can actually breathe!

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Hi, Redstorm -


I was wondering how your daughter was doing. I know it's hard to see your daughter head out into a new direction away from dance, but when my older daughter did so, it was such a relief. As you say, when you see them happy and healthy, it is so gratifying. Please keep in touch - you have been such an asset to this board. Enjoy the rest of your summer with your family!

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Thanks for making that post, reminding us all how easy it is to get caught up in the flattery and praise. When certainly the grass is not always greener at a residency. No one will ever take care of your child the way you will. Best of luck to your daughter.

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Dear Redstorm,


Although we have never communicated personally, I have always read your posts with great interest, and most especially so as your DD left to pursue her training. Thank you for your frank discussions and for letting us know that your sweet girl found life after dance! My own is entering a residency this Fall, and everything I have garnered from these discussions has given me a strong basis/education as my husband and I came to our decision for our DD this past week.

Congratulations to her as she enters her new area and much well-deserved success to her as well!

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Unhappily, I am adding my youngest dd in this topic. As some of you know, she had knee surgery at the end of Feb. after doing auditions for dance colleges and trainees. She was offered 2 trainee/ post grad positions and 2 ballet majors. She chose one of the ballet majors and now finally has told me that she doesn't want to try and dance anymore. Her knee is better- had been trying some barres and has still been going to PT. I am very sad since I had danced professionally, her older sister is a pro now, and I feel she is giving up before she can see if her knee will be back to normal. She told me she doesn't think she can do it mentally or physically anymore- she just turned 18 and graduated from hs in May. She also has always had an issue of keeping her weight down. I think she has seen how hard it is for her older sister to get jobs and sees me struggling as a single parent teaching ballet. She wants to stay at the college that she planned to go to and change majors- to what she doesn't know...

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balletgirl--our thoughts are with your daughter as she makes her decisions. The dance life is not for everyone and many times an injury brings that out. I"m sure whatever direction she chooses to go it will be the decision. Please keep us posted!

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Redstorm - I'm glad you've shared your story. It will be so valuable to parents and dance students as they make decisions navigating through this often confusing world of ballet training. Your daughter has been so brave to just say no to an unhealthy situation, for recognizing that she needed to make a major shift in her life, and for moving forward - with stars in her eyes, no less!


I also want to thank you personally for your generosity with your time and knowledge both on the boards, and "behind the scenes." Your advice to me personally has been right on, and I have valued your help more than you can know. I wish you and your great big family joy and adventure as you continue to skid sideways through life, chocolate in one hand, martini in the other screaming WOO HOO! What a ride! :)

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Hi Redstorm,

Your daughter showed strength and maturity to make that very tough phone call. You and your parenting skills are the reason for that. Big congrats to her for keeping those grades high in spite of everything.


Thanks for sharing your story, hard as it was. I hope you'll still hang out here as I enjoy hearing your point of view.



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Thank you for telling us your story. Your daughter is amazingly gifted and will succeed wherever she sets her sights and heart. I have loved reading your honest and helpful posts. Please check back in often because you have a lot to offer. Best of luck to you and your family.

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She will find herself and you both will look back and know it was the right choice for her at that time,

plus you have 2 other dancers, what a talented family!!!




Very glad your daughter is ok and healing from a tough year at residency. Having had experience with the philosophy and training at residency, I agree that if your home training is good, keep them home. Need to add... my opinion only


Best to both families,




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Guest balletandsynchro

Dear Redstorm,

All the best to you, your daughter and your family. I'm sure that your daughter will be a success on the stage and have a wonderful time at University next yer!


Dear Balletgirl22sk,

I am so glad that your daughter is feeling better, and that the knee is improving. My daughter and i are thinking of her, and we are certain that she will choose what is the best path study/careerwise for her. You have been such a help to us, with your postings and messages. Please keep us all up to date with your elder daughter's new company, and as always, your great perspective on the ballet biz.

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Big hugs to balletgirl22sk and Redstorm :wacko: . I know that this situation is a very difficult one to navigate as it is filled with so many conflicting emotions for both you and your daughters. You have my very best wishes for each of them as they forge new paths. I have no doubt that they will both be highly successful in any area that they choose. For you moms, I do hope you will come back and visit us here often. You have both provided much assistance, support and insight here on BT. I know that ballet22sk still has dancing daughters, so I hope that neither of you will be strangers here! :sweating:

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Wishing both of your daughters all of the best as they enter this new phase of their lives. I hope both of you will keep posting your insights on BT4D.



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